.

A heavy sort of sadness sinks into my bones
Rest there, and calls it home.
A tangible silence in the space between us
The static of a broken tape

The sun rises, it is bright and it is beautiful
I inhale and try not to think of you
Or to think of you in the vocabulary of my past
But I don't remember those words

What was I saying?

I'm not sad, I am weary and I feel this weight
I am glad that you will be better
In the way that a plant must be glad when it is pruned
Next spring it will bloom

Broken ribs and blood pouring down your skin
Hurt I cannot erase
But I did not cause, I loved you the best I could
It's not your fault that you did not need me

The doctor said this will heal.

I know you will read these words
But they are not for you
They are mine and I will let them fall
Like the tears I will not cry


Tremors in the earth shake, cracks appear
Metaphors fall to pieces
Fire flames and burns brightly, I cannot see
Poetry become just syllables

Lost
       Falling
                Ceasing to

Exist, did what we have even exist?

The briefest breathe provides no life
But we breathed it anyway
The air was sweet and tainted with smoke
I can still taste it.


I can't
no
I won't

                       speak

Words grasp at the edges of my brain.

Chaos surround me but you have made sense of it
You have cleaved a path
Through this debris, through this madness
You are winning

I will not love you less, I cannot love you less
But I will not let you no me
Weigh you down anymore, the burden is to great
I cannot carry it for you

But I will lighten the load
If I cannot light the way.